Thursday, October 19, 2006

4 weeks 6 days

Me again. Not much to write about, but I figured I would anyway. I just got home from working my 2nd night turn in a row... only one more to go.

Let me just say that I WAS SO TIRED LAST NIGHT! Usually I get really tired around 2-3am or so, then get my 2nd wind after drinking a nice big cup of hot tea. OH, how I was missing that hot tea lastnight. I was falling asleep and there was nothing I could do about it but get up and take a walk. No tea... no nothing. Hell,I even nodded off in the bathroom! IN THE BATHROOM! I was just sitting there and thought, "Hmm... I'll just rest my eyes a minute." I only fell asleep for a few minutes, but jeez... the bathroom?! LOL

Dealing with the cramps, they're few and far between now. Every once in awhile I'll get one that makes me feel all lightheaded (I have a very low pain tolerance!)but other than that it's been fine. 'The girls' still really hurt though, but that's about it. I haven't been getting sick to my stomach. That's the first question everyone seems to ask me... "Are you feeling sick yet?"

I've found that I'm being such a worrywort about all of this though. Hearing how many people have had miscarriages, and knowing that my cousin and my mom both had one... it just stresses me out to no end. I don't want that to happen to me.

Being that this all new to me, I have no idea what to expect... what is normal, what's not-so-normal. I just keep stressing myself out, probably over nothing. Every little twinge, every little cramp makes me cringe and think something's wrong. Until my doctor's appointment, I feel like I should take a pregnancy test everyday just to make sure I'm still pregnant. I haven't, but I feel like I should. I know it's early and that the morning sickness will be starting soon if it's going to, but part of me wishes that I'd feel nauseated or start throwing up... just so I know things are ok. Man, does that sound weird... (sigh) I just find myself praying to God everyday that He watches over me and the little life growing inside me. Prayer is what is giving me strength right now.

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